“Annoyed, but still hanging, for the sake of the twenty-five dollars, to her self-control, Helga gave her head a little toss and flung out her hands in a helpless, beaten way. Then she shrugged. What did it matter? ‘Oh, well, if you really want to know. I assure you, it’s nothing interesting. Or nasty,’ she added maliciously. ‘It’s just plain horrid. For me.’ And she began mockingly to relate her story.” (39)
This paragraph is from Helga’s pilgrimmage to New York with Mrs. Hayes-Rore when Helga is pressed for information on her “people.” Through body-language and verbal assurances Helga attempts to make the story of her origins unimportant both to her and Mrs. Hayes-Rore – the head-toss, the helpless hand-flinging, shrugging. Feigning disinterest – “Oh, well, if you really want to know.” Even without reading the preceding paragraphs, where Mrs. Hayes-Rore is called Helga’s “tormenter” and intuites that the subject bothers Helga, and the following, where Helga’s attempts at poise fall completely apart, we can see Helga’s passion and discomfort here in the way she over-reacts: adding “or nasty” in a malicious tone only seems like an attempt at humor but is really a way of covertly attacking Mrs. Hayes-Rore for having an interest in “nasty” things as a way of getting back for making her tell her hateful story, and the falling-short-of-ironic “It’s just horrid. For me.” Based on these contextual clues it becomes apparent Helga’s mocking handling of her life-story is only a cover for her hurt, resentment, and bewilderment.
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